Let's Be Young Forever ♥

I went to watch Eclipse yesterday; needless to say it was ..Alright.

It’s always nice to imagine that someone could love you forever, risk their entire existence for you, protect you, and be there for you when you need them the most. Too bad it was just a movie, and the trance that takes over while a movie is playing ruptures and you’re forced back to reality. A reality that’s not so perfect. Not so fantastical and flawless; where the supernatural and fantasy do not coalesce to make miracles. Maybe that’s why I’m so mesmerized by vampires.  

Ah vampires… ♡ 

People have been engrossed and lured by their seductive nature for centuries, and whether your idea of a vampire is the Babylonian Ekimmu, who feeds off of the souls of the living, or Bram Stoker’s bloodthirsty Dracula, or Anne Rice’s dazzlingly alluring Lestat, or even Stephanie Meyer’s sparkling, “vegetarian” Edward. You can’t reject their unvarying appeal. The undead have a propensity to generate a spark of interest wherever they may emerge. Maybe it’s the details of immortality, maybe it’s the enhanced physical beauty that they have come to be renowned for (although this wasn’t always true), or perhaps it’s the seductive temperament of how they feed on their victims. Everything about them has come to be delectably seductive.  They have come from being sadistic, vicious creatures of darkness, to romantic, brooding, passionate, lost souls in search of more in their lives. In search of, dare I say it; love? 

I presume everyone is familiar to that sentiment, if not most people.

I’ve always been entirely captivated and enthralled by vampires.  Their powers, their disposition, their appeal. This fascination only grew with time, and with the advent of many television shows, (True Blood, The Vampire Diaries, Moonlight, etc) novels and simply an infinite hype surrounding it that has amplified over the years. People want to see more vampires, read about them, and hear of them. Even become one of them. 

So let’s say everything that the media has come to portray is true, let’s say vampires exist. Would you wish to give your life away, damn your soul, and become one of the undead? Interminable and young forever? Or preserve your human life.

Would you die for immortality? 

xoxo ♥

Screw Prince Charming.

Don’t fall in love. Don’t think about it. Don’t talk about it. Don’t listen to it.

Don’t fall in love.

Why, you ask. Because all it will do is make you love sick. Love sick over a person who in the end will leave you high and dry, then forget you. You give yourself; heart, body and soul, to this one person. A person you put your trust in, you confide in, you believe in. A person who you would sacrifice everything for… And for what reason?

For nothing.

Falling in love almost always ends badly. You’re left broken, in your microscopic vestiges… Left to glue yourself back together with only fragments of your wrecked soul, and the minuscule remnants of your self-esteem… After that, no matter how hard you try to trust… You can’t. People tell you to move on but all you can think of are the “good” times. You never realize that the person you were “in love” with was a complete first degree asshole who never really gave a shit about you in the first place.

Disney gives little girls a "perfect" perception of love; filled with dreams and fantasies and a Prince Charming who will come and save the damsel in distress, sweep her off her feet, place her on his beautiful white horse and take her to his kingdom to live happily ever after.

Bull. Shit.

There is no Prince Charming. There is no white horse. There is no kingdom, and most of all; there is NO happily ever after.

They’re all really just chauvinistic assholes who don’t care about anyone but themselves and their genitals. They lie, cheat, and break your heart to pieces until your left shattered and alone; alone with only ambiguous memories, and disoriented thoughts. Until that grief, that pain; turns to rage. A rage so fierce that your own perception of love, whether it came from Walt Disney or not, is skewed. It’s hard to put your trust in people in general, but when you put yourself out there, entrust your heart to someone, and believe them when they say they will never hurt you, that they love you, and then they abuse your trust, abuse your love, and wound you; a wound so deep that no prescription of anesthesia, whether local or general, will ease the pain. Leaving you feeling completely and utterly betrayed. What do you do then? How are you supposed to move on? How are you supposed to love again?

I used to believe in love…

I will not allow myself to be so naïve again.

Screw you Prince Charming.

xoxo

You Can't Sit With Us☮♥

Today I went to a really squalid looking clinic to get my medical forms sorted for my visa. I don’t understand why the embassy had to choose that specific clinic for people to go to. It was really revolting.

One thing I noticed, which irritated me, was the fact that even in that shitty little clinic, discrimination was noticeable. You had to be blind not to be aware of it… I walked in, NOT wearing the traditional Abaya and Sheila that the natives of this country are intended to wear- just FYI I seldom ever wear it as I don’t believe in it- then again that’s just my outlook on the case. Anyway, I walked in and the nurse at the reception treated me like everyone else, until she found out my nationality. That was when she advised me to wait my turn, in an explicit room. The thing is, she was really sketchy about it so I just asked her why I couldn’t wait in the other room, in which a few seconds beforehand, I saw an Indian lady walk in to. She mumbled something unintelligible and told me I could wait wherever I wanted to. That it was my choice. So I chose to follow the Indian woman into the same room the nurse had disjointedly told me not to sit in. To my surprise I found that the clinic was separating the patients on the basis of nationality. The minority of the country were placed in a room with old paint peeling off of the walls, and orange, plastic, garden chairs. While the other room contained; bulky, indigo, leather seats which were placed around a brightly lit, air conditioned waiting area.

I do not understand the need to discriminate against people, and then segregate them! We are all born equal… Or so they say… I wish to live in a world were favoritism and prejudice of any kind, did not exist. Where people are treated equally and seen and appreciated for who they are and not judged and condemned simply because of their race, gender, sexual orientation… Or even age. This being said, I’m not that naïve. I know that we live in a sickening, irrevocable, sadistic and corrupted world; a place where hatred is the norm, where blackmail is the only way to achieve things. Why do we choose to live like this? Why is it that people always seem to jump to war? - The alleged immediate conclusion to any problem. Why do we fight, and hate, and try to annihilate other people…

There is always another way. You just have to maintain your search for it.


Safe to say, I decided to wait in the room with the peeling walls.

♥ xoxo

This is Madness

So today my mom woke me up at 8:30 AM. Way too early for me to even be considering leaving my bed since it IS summer. BUT my medical form application papers arrived in the mail today! YES!! This means that I can FINALLY go and get my medical examination and send it to the embassy in Abu Dhabi. In case you're utterly confused, I'm going to university in the fall in Canada, and I've been trying to get all of my papers sorted for the past couple of months. However, I'm supposed to refer to the embassy in Abu Dhabi in order to obtain my study permit and so on... Anyway, they're taking way too long to process everything and my summer is already half way over! :( That's why receiving the forms in the mail has got me so excited.

Yea, that's pretty much all I have to say about that.

On another note, I really miss my friends... Almost everyone's left Qatar for summer and it's really killing me. There is NOTHING to do here... I live in the desert, and at the moment it's too hot to tan. THAT'S how hot it is. I can honestly say that I cannot wait until August. Leaving the desert and experiencing new things that I would never even imagine doing here.

Excitement.

mmm... okay ♥

Hello World ♥

I'm new at this. I've never had a blog before. The last time I wrote down my feelings was a couple of years ago, and that didn't exactly bode well for me. So I guess this is hello.

I should probably start by telling you a little about myself. Well, I'm eighteen, I've just graduated from high school, and I'm from Qatar. If you don't know where that is.. Let's just say it's in the Middle East, and near Dubai. :)

I love the Arts.

Dancing and sketching are some of the things that take me away from all of the realities that consistently plague every single endless day of my life. Photography also provides a remedy to my eternal boredom, as does literature and learning new languages.Oh, and i ♥ Fashion.

I'm passionate about certain aspects of politics; most are feminist in nature, although human rights in general are what get me going; especially when there's injustice surrounding me. I made this blog out of (you guessed it!) Pure boredom. But I guess it's also because I wanted an outlet that didn't involve a punching bag.

So anyway, what was it that I was saying before..

Ah yes...

Hello ♥